Second year Day 228 - Monday July 29, 2013

We got up and got things packed up.  Arrianne was still staying with us at the hotel, and she didn't have to leave until 9:30, so we decided to stay and visit until then.  After goodbyes, and finally left about 10:00.  I had to take a couple of phone calls between 9:30 and 10:00 so that slowed us down some.  The trip overall went very well, although it ended up taking us 11-1/2 hours to get home.  I guess we just stopped too many times again.  Oh well, what can you do.  Also, I decided to go through Missoula and while passing through, we stopped at the Good Food Store and picked up some fresh fruit and veggies so that we'd have food for tomorrow.  It's always hard to get home and have nothing we can eat! The guys don't keep fresh produce on hand while I'm gone.  Mark pulled in about 10 minutes after we did, as he had stopped at the auction on the way home.  He was hoping to beat us, and almost made it!  It was very weird to come through the garage and past Jake's area and not see Jake.  It will all take some time to get used to.  I felt some quick tears coming, but pushed them back and stayed focused on unpacking.  Another trip completed!  There's lots to get done tomorrow, and we are all exhausted and so we headed right to bed. 

Second year Day 227 - Sunday July 28, 2013

Jenn has church at 8:00 and there was no way we could all get ready and out by then.  Everyone was exhausted and slept in.  We went to her house for lunch at 11:30 and ended up staying to visit for three hours!  Bridgett made it the whole time and didn't ask to leave until the last maybe 10 minutes!  Exciting! We all crashed for a much needed nap afterwards and then hit the freeway to visit grandma and then Scott.  However, our plans were changed a bit after we got on the freeway.  First, Scott called and said that he was just about home. He had driven back to Kalispell to get another load on Saturday and was returning today. He said that they were headed to Hillsteads for dinner so either come now or come much later on. Well, I was already headed up there, and later on wouldn't work very well for Bridgett because she'd be ready for bed before we'd get back.  So, I said that we'd come there first. Then I called mom and switched plans with her.  Afterwards, everything seemed under control and then suddenly there was terrible traffic and I realized that there were construction on the north bound freeway between American Fork and Lehi approximately.  I couldn't figure out any other way to get to the first exit past the point of the mountain, so we stayed on the freeway (although it would have been very difficult to get off from the carpool lane anyway).  It took FOREVER!   I called Scott, panicked that we'd miss them, but he said that they couldn't leave yet anyway because a repair person was headed to their house.  That was pretty amazing that the property owner actually got someone to come out on a Sunday.  Of course, the air conditioner was not working properly and it's been 100 degrees, so I guess that qualifies as an emergency!  We finally made it to Draper and got to Scott's house.  It's a really cute place and we all like it.  We had a great visit there with Scott, Jaclyn and Weston.  Jaclyn and Weston had been to church and met some people so that was nice.  Ben and Lauren (Jaclyn's sister) and their baby were visiting.  They left just as we were arriving, headed to get some dinner for everyone.  Jaclyn kept the baby and she sure loves that baby!  They need to get some food because the stove/oven was also broken and being replaced.  We visited for about 1-1/2 hours and then Ben and Lauren came back with hot food and we left so that they could all eat while things were hot.  We headed to grandma's house next and we ended up being there for quite a while as well.  Arrianne had never been there before.  Grandma's got a great apartment.  It's so big really--three bedrooms and it's all very spacious.  Her rent is much less then her previous place AND the utilities are included.  So, all around it's a great deal.  Stephany and mom discussed some art stuff in the kitchen while Bridgett and Arrianne looked at old picture albums in the living room.  I wandered between conversations.  We were going to leave after about an hour, but Bridgett's neck got really tight.  I think it was just a combination of all of the driving, and visiting with everyone sitting up without having a chance to lay down.  I had to give her a lortab and then she rested on mom's bed for about a half an hour until the pain started to ease up.  Finally the pain was mostly under control and we said goodbye.  This is the longest I have been able to visit with mom since the accident.  All in all it was a really great day for us and I just couldn't believe how much visiting we got done.  Of course, we were all tired out afterwards.  I won't rush off tomorrow, but sleep until I wake up, which will be pretty early anyway:).

Second year Day 226 - Saturday July 27, 2013

I'm not sure that I mentioned it but one reason I want to check out everything with the eye surgery is because Arrianne's friend, Emily, who had a traumatic brain injury, had double vision all of the time after her accident and she had eye surgery back in September.  The surgery re-aligned her eyes, but she still has double vision.  She is Arrianne's age, so younger than Bridgett.  Now they are trying to figure out alternative ways to deal with the eyes, including "patching" one eye by using a solid contact lens to occlude one eye.  So, we personally know someone who has experienced the fact that the brain may not be able to deal with the surgery and may just see double afterwards, even though the eyes are aligned.  This makes the worry greater.  I should see if he will give me a percentage of people that have a problem after the surgery, of TBI patients.  He was pretty specific that this could very easily happen.  Also, I am concerned because the Dr. didn't check her actual vision, but they did do a brief exam.  They asked her to identify letters on the screen and she couldn't read them unless they were very large, like way back in Feb 2012.  So, what's up with that?  Her eyes got much better and now they are worse?  Dr. Hoffman said that Dr. Warner could check her vision and see what's happening with that.  The problem is that it takes like four months to get in to see her.  Hmmm......We had our last appointment with Faith today, after checking out of the hotel and then headed back to Provo and checked in.  Afterwards we had some running around to do, shopping etc and dinner.  About 7:30 we went to Jenn's house to visit and had a very nice time there.  It was actually kind of late when we finally all tried to get some sleep.  It will be a busy day tomorrow.

Second year Day 225 - Friday July 26, 2013

How's this for a random memory....the floor at the hotel in Richfield squeaks in some of the rooms.  We've stayed in rooms with the squeaky floor before and Bridgett's never said this before.  Today she said, hey this floor squeaks like the floor in the log house did before dad and Tyler fixed it!  Like I said before, such random memories!  But cool!  Also, she said sometime this week that she should get a toradol shot for pain like Tyler did for his neck (like months ago)!  We don't ever talk about that, she just remembers it.

Second year Day 224 - Thursday July 25, 2013

Today I was up before everyone (like normal!).  I talked to Mark (outside of the room) and found out that Jake died during the night.  I was upset and cried a lot.  I felt silly to cry so much, but there was just a lot of pent up emotion that needed to come out I guess.  I still have a lot of emotion about Jess dying as well I think.  Anyway, I also talked to Tyler about the whole thing.  I said that I felt a little guilty that I didn't want to be there when he died, but he said it was best anyway.  It's hard to see your pet like that.  Mark stayed home this morning and made a coffin for Jake.  They will bury him next to Jess.  I told the girls about it and said that we'd have a funeral when we get home.  Stephany cried with me.  Bridgett was very sad and did some fake crying, but nothing too much.  She kept saying that now Jess and Jake would be together.  That's how I'm trying to think of it! As a note....several people that have someone with a brain injury have asked me about Bridgett showing emotion.  She very rarely gets angry.  She laughs a lot.  She doesn't cry really, but then she hardly ever, ever cried before the wreck either.  She looks sad when she's sad and talks upset, but no real tears.  Oh, I'm compiling a list of questions for the eye doctor as well as for Bob.

Second year Day 223 - Wednesday July 24, 2013

Last night, Mark and a few other guys helped to get Scott's trailer all loaded up so that they can move today.  It's also Scott's birthday today, so not too much fun for a birthday! We checked out of the hotel and headed to Monroe this morning.  We will stay in Richfield again.  Our appointment with Faith went well.  We discussed Dr. Hoffman's appointment.  I forgot to say that the paper he gave me said that he would resect and recess her right eye.  What does that mean?  Recess her eye?  Is he talking about actually moving it back in the socket?  This is one of the questions I need to discuss with him.  We have lots to think about.  One pressure....so we make this decision to go ahead with the surgery and talk to Bridgett and get her to agree.  If there is a less than optimal outcome and later when she is more aware...what if she says that she would never have done it and is upset.  I mean, its making a big decision for her without really knowing what she'd want to do.  Initially, when we have talked about surgery, Bridgett has said that she doesn't want ANY surgery of ANY kind at all.  We have been talking regularly about this surgery and she is getting more open to the idea.  However, she has to be willing to go through the surgery and feel good about it too.  A lot to think about, anyway. 

Second year Day 222 - Tuesday July 23, 2013

Well, today was a hard day, and I've taken my time writing about it!  The morning started off hectic, with Arrianne needing some things for opera and me running around to help her get things together.  Arrianne headed to opera and I ran off to an appointment of mine and left Bridgett and Stephany at the hotel.  I got back just in time to grab lunch for the three of us and then leave Stephany at the hotel while Bridgett and I went to the see Dr. Robert Hoffman at the Primary Children's Hospital.  More about that in a minute.  Then after a couple of hours there, we hit the freeway in time for rush hour and headed back to Provo.  Bridgett and I stopped at Target in Orem to look for a present for Caden, as today is his third birthday.  We also got a present for Connor at the same time, as his birthday is on August 8th.  Next we stopped at Cafe Rio to pick up dinner to eat at the hotel with Jenn and family.  They were already at the hotel, swimming.  We all had dinner together and unwrapped presents, as well as had cake (in the lobby).  Afterwards, they headed for home to put the kids to bed, and we all collapsed upstairs.  So, the doctors appointment.....first let me say that the guy at the front desk of Dr. Hoffman's office is a gem!  His name is Rick. He was just so funny and friendly and had Bridgett joking back and forth from the minute we walked in.  I also listened to him interact with others, and no matter the age, he was just great!  The nurses were all great as well.  Even though we had some wait time, in a room with lots of kids, Bridgett did great.  I chalk that up to the fact that she had her ipad to play games or read and her ipod to listen to and block out the noise!  It worked very successfully!  When we met the Dr.,  he explained something that no one else had yet.  He said that the shunt in the mid brain did indeed cause the parinaud's syndrome (and I think the problems with the optic nerves themselves) but that the reason for the strabismus (misalignment of the eyes) was the high intracranial pressure. He said it caused palsy of the sixth nerve and the fourth nerve.  At least that makes more sense to me than thinking that the eyes are misaligned because of the injury to the brain.  He recommends surgery on both eyes, and then approximately six months later, another surgery on the left eye again.  He said after they have addressed the sixth nerve palsy in these surgeries, then he could address the fourth nerve palsy (with more surgery).  Hmmmm.  I was a little shocked and dazed with all the information.  She has absolutely no depth perception (obviously) and he doesn't guarantee that she would after the surgery.  I spoke of the possibility, in the future, of driving and he said that depth perception is not required in any state to get a drivers license.  That's disturbing I think!  Anyway, I guess I was upset because of two things.  First, he said that even though they do the surgery, she probably would never had full movement of the eyes.  I was hoping that she would be able to move the eyes outward, but he said probably not. Second, he said that because of the traumatic brain injury, there is no way to tell how her brain will handle the surgery. Right now she does not see double at all, but he said that after aligning the eyes she may start to see double and they may not be able to fix it.  Whoa!  So, no double vision now, but possibly double vision then that wouldn't be correctable!  So, that's something to think about.  Something a little bit scary and unknown for sure.  He said there is absolutely no predictor of what will happen and it could go either way.  However, he was in favor of the surgery, as the eyes would be aligned and look normal.  I had some questions, but I wasn't prepared for the things he talked about so I'll have to call and have a whole new set of questions answered I guess.  He said that low vision therapy would be a good thing for Bridgett.  He said that we should consult with Dr. Judith Warner (neuro ophthalmologist) after the surgery for glasses.